Senyum kambing..

Aku rasa, bulan ni dan bulan lepas merupakan bulan yg hectic dan penuh debaran. Berdebar sbb aku baru lepas submit visa to extend stay di sini. Tertekan juga sbb aku jadi tertunggu2 sbb tak pasti dgn visa application status. Termasuk, tertekan bila visa yg aku tunggu2 tu masih dalam process of consideartion sedangkan masa aku terlalu suntuk utk aku pergi ke meeting di US. Selain tu, aku tertekan fasal nak kene submit 1st draft thesis aku by end of this month fasal nak mengejar dateline di samping nak kene siapkan model prediction aku..yg aku kira dah nampak jalan penyelesaiannya..

Kkdg aku rase sprt bodohnya aku keep on hold my analysis terlalu lama sdgkan mmg aku dah tahu dr awal, I am able to make it and finish it on time if I want..mungkin aku orgnya jenis last minute..bila di saat akhir, dalam keadaan terdesak mampu memerah otak utk mendapatkan walau sedikit output. Skrg dah 1.49 pagi aku masih berjaga menyelesaikan apa yg perlu. Dan kalu ikutkan, aku mmg keletihan yg amat sbb sejak beberapa menjak ni mmg aku berjalan kaki ke school. It takes me about 10-15 minutes by foot nak sampai university dan elok plak aku skrg sejak dapat wake up call kene bayar study fees sendiri dan mula terasa bengap bila lama sgt terperuk di rumah buat kerja aku..aku mula rajin2 semula datang ke school. Langkah lain sbg persediaan aku nak brush up my english before my presentation and my examination, aku take part time job(4hrs/ week) kat school sbg assistant lecterur for ms word& ms excel. Dari situ, suppose aku akan develop my communication skills besides able to improve my level of confidence in speaking. Aku beritahu my darling yg life aku skrg a bit hectic and then my darling re-assured me, by making myself busy, I will learn to manage my time better. Sungguh, my new job offer, requires me to be in school everyday excluding Monday and Wednesday. Tghari tadi sms nak jumpa my boss, mmg sejuk gila tak tatau nak kata..berlapis2 baju aku pakai..syukur amat2 aku ade waterproof jacket Nike which my darling bought last year for me that makes my life easier bila hujan2 nak ke school. In fact, skrg pon terasa kesejukannya..kaki aku dah terasa kesejukannya..Esok pagi, dalam 9.00 pagi aku dah kene terjegil ke school lagi sbb nak cari building where the tutorial need to be conducted sbb hari ni aku tak survey langsung pon bangunan tu kat mana..Kkdg aku rase, aku lucky from the others..mmg lucky dr org2 di sini..kenapa aku kata diri aku lucky..sbb aku dah a few times dapat opportunity to attend conference/ meeting overseas..pon boss aku tak kedekut nak sponsor and confident dgn anak buahnya tanpa byk kata..some people kata, boss aku tu bukannya jenis caring..tapi, aku tahu, deep in his heart dia mmg baik hati orgnya..cume, of coursela kita kene selalu approach dia..aku rase dia dah byk tolong aku..so, kenapa plak aku nak spoilkan pertolongan yg dia berikan kpd aku??? Aku katakan, aku lucky lagi..sbb org lain dapat conduct tutorial for 2hrs/ week..tapi seingat aku biasa aku mmg buat keje2 teaching assistant/ lab demo ni mmg akunye man hours dalam 5hrs/ week. Terasa berdebar2 juga aku nak jumpa student2 esok..ntah mcmana agaknya peel student overseas ni..tapi, aku rasa sama aje takde bezanya ngan student di Mesia juga..

Last saturday, sbg preparation to attend the meeting, aku dah kecoh2 kat my darling tentang blazer yg aku nak pakai kali ini. Aku beli blazer tu time sales. Just £25 for the whole set including the skirts..ntah tataula cun ke idak aku nak pakai masa meeting nanti..sejuk2 di US, kata my darling sanggup plak aku nak pakai skirt?? Then, aku bagitau my darling, I just have got no choice coz that was the cheapest that I could get as my other suites just too big for me since I have reduced hell out of more weight after I had my girl. Before this, I was size 12-14, but now I have gone down to 8-10. Bukan nak perasan slim. Tapi, adalah penurunan sket2..as kalu aku nak pakai suite yg besar2 nampak mcm nangka kene bungkus plak nanti..

Today, after meeting with my boss, I was very happy as I have got some solution to rectify my problem and hope I could work harder to finish everything. Selain tu, aku happy fasal my boss kata dia bule sponsor akunye tiket kapal terbang ke US kali ni..yahoo!

Awal pagi..

Hari ini lembaran baru sume org dalam rumah kene bangkit awal. My darling pukul 7.30 has left the house to work. My boy, kul 7.00a.m dah kene bangkit dan mandi. Siap pakai baju oleh kerana kesejukan&mengantuk, my boy, bule tertonggeng menyorok bawak comforter. Kalu ikutkan mata aku pon sama2 berat nak bangun. Dalam 7.30 a.m, aku dah busy spend masa dalam bilik air mandi nak menyegarkan badan. Pukul 7.50 a.m aku dah bersiap2 utk brg2 my girl sbb husband bb sitter aku nak pick my girl pukul 8 a.m. Lucky enough, J datang bersama A..jadi, tidakla aku segan sgt. Kesian juga bila tgk, my girl menangis2 sakan, bila J nak letakkan my girl dalam car seat. Elok plak si A ade di situ...sbb setahu aku mmg my girl takut kat si A sbb katanya si A..mungkin sbb si A berbadan besar kot..

Balik dr hantar my boy, aku berkenalan dgn this new person from Egypt..nampak serious orgnya..strict pon iye..katenya dia study di Egypt dan skrg follow her husband yg further PhD di sini..aku offer her for a ride..tapi, dia decline..mungkin tak mahu nak susahkan org..aku rase mungkin aku akan jalan kaki juga macam org lain hantar dan pick si my boy..tapi, asik tergendala..fasal..hari ni plak spoil baju t-shirt school my boy basah..puas aku gosok nak bagi kering..

Fashion golden rule..

What Not to Wear isn't about the latest fashions, it's about teaching people about personal style, dressing for their shape, and personality and learning how to make the most of their natural assets.

Body Shape
1. Get naked. Then stand in front of a mirror, and ask yourself what you love about your body and what you hate. The things you hate are what will hide; the things you love are the things you can afford to show off. Be honest and objective. What you hate might be the envy of your best friend (consider Susannah's big breasts!)

2. Flat-chested: Most women who are flat-chested have a tendency to carry their weight on their bum. So, show off those arms with a lovely sleeveless round neck top. Most importantly, don't make tits that aren't there. Just accept it and if want to be sexy (and you are in your 30s), show a bit of nipple, gently.

3. Pear-shaped: Never wear jackets that cut you across the arse. Either wear a jacket that ends at the waist (to show your bum off) or wear one to the knee (to cover it up).

4. Short-waisted with long legs: If you have a short body and long legs, chances are you have big tits. Pull up the breasts with a really good bra so they won't accentuate your short waist. Also, wear short jackets that hit the hip-bone.

5. Long body with short legs: Never wear cropped trousers; they make your legs shorter. Layer your top half. Like Trinny, wear a long t-shirt under a sweater to break up your long back. Don't forget to keep your trousers very long, and wear a higher heel to put yourself back in proportion.

6. Large-size: Don't tent yourself and don't be afraid to wear tighter clothes. Try a plunging neckline to show off your beautiful dècolletè.

7. Short neck: Buy deep V or low fronted tops. High necks will only make your neck look shorter.

8. Broad shoulders and slim hips: Buy flat-fronted long trousers and skirts cut on the bias.

In Your Wardrobe
1. Go through your wardrobe and ask yourself "what have I not worn for the past two years." Find those things and chuck 'em in the bin.

2. Play with your clothes. Remember when you were eight in the dressing-up box and you would rearrange your wardrobe by color? New outfits will begin to appear that you wouldn't have considered putting together before.

General Clothing Tips
1. Always wear color with color. Don't wear bright pink or turquoise with black. It cheapens the color. If your main color is plum, then you can wear red, pink, or orange with it. They all look wonderful and you will look taller, skinnier, and far more stylish.

2. Never wear leather trousers unless you are a biker. They have connotations, and however cold it is, you still sweat in the crotch. You'll look like a gunslinger with a wet pubic area. And they hardly flatter anyone's bum.

3. Look at the VPL (Visible Panty Line). Ban all knickers that show through your trousers.

4. Don't wear clinging clothes, but clothes that skim the body and show off shape. No matter what size you are there is always shape there, your wrist or your neck. Whatever ever it is, show it off.

5. Shoes are very important. You can see a woman who is beautifully dressed but can be disappointed by her footwear. If you've got thick ankles never wear an ankle strap across you ankle. Likewise if you've got skinny legs, little teetering heels look like they are going to snap because your body is heavier than your legs.

6. Don't wear lots of eye make-up and lots of lipstick. You want to show off one and let the other fade into the background. The same applies to tits and legs. Show off the tits or show off the legs, not both.

7. No woman over the age of 35 should wear skirts above the knee.

8. Trousers that are slightly too big make you look much skinnier than trousers that are a bit too tight.

what to wear(average hips&thighs)

Abide by the following rules when you hit the high street and we'll make a leggy, supermodel of you yet.

Avoid three-quarter length trousers because they make legs look shorter. Trousers should be full length, falling to the bottom of the heel
Don't wear trousers with turn-ups or wide legs, instead opt for narrow, straight legs or bootcut trousers
Skirts and trousers with high waistbands make legs look longer too.
Create the illusion of height by wearing a top and bottom of the same colour, drawing the eye up and down.
Longer length jackets worn undone also give the illusion of height.
Avoid chunky, ribbed tops that widen rather than lengthen the body.
Wear heels.

If you have shoulders that would put an Olympic swimmer to shame, then try to balance out your body shape to give the illusion of a smaller frame.

Opt for bootleg trousers and fishtail skirts that widen at the bottom of the garment. It will balance out the shoulders.
Wrap-around tops are very flattering if you've got wide shoulders.
Avoid halter-necks which draw attention to shoulders.
Avoid delicate-looking tops, for example, ones with spaghetti straps.

Despite having average-sized boobs, there may be occasions when you want to give the illusion of a fuller bust.

Always wear a bra.
Wear high-necked tops or roll-necks to accentuate your boobs.
Opt for delicate tops with spaghetti straps.
Sleeveless, round-necked tops that show off your arms are great.
Wear tops in a lighter colour than your lower half.

As the proud owner of a fabulously, tiny waist, you must, of course, do everything you can to show it off!

Avoid covering your great asset with long, loose clothing.
Cropped tops draw attention to the waist.
Wear tops that end around the waist.
Don't cover the waist up by wearing high-waisted trousers.

If your tummy isn't a problem area, but isn't necessarily something you would want to draw attention to, use these rules when you go shopping:

Flat-fronted trousers and skirts are really flattering for a larger tummy. Try to avoid pleats and front zips - side and back zips are a much more flattering option.
Low-waisted trousers make stomachs look smaller.
Don't wear anything that's gathered at the waist.
Wear soft, forgiving fabrics that don't cling to the tummy.
Wrap-around tops create folds across the tummy that detract from any other rippling in that area.
Avoid belted jackets and coats. The belt will ride up and give the impression that you're pregnant.

If your hips and thighs are of average size, then you're one of the lucky ones. Flatter this area by avoiding the following clothes, which can visually add pounds to the hips and thighs:

Long dresses and skirts cut on the bias.
Trousers with detail, such as side pockets.
Belted jackets and coats which flare out at the bottom.

If the answer to the question: "Does my bum look big in this?" is a resounding "yes!", then consider the following tips before hitting the high street.

Avoid wearing light colours on your lower half.
Avoid narrow-legged trousers.
Wear longer jackets that fall below the bottom and never wear jackets that end where your bum starts.
Wear jumpers around the waist over trousers to break up the expanse of bottom.
Opt for wide-bottomed trousers with no detail, such as pockets with pinstripes, on the bottom and avoid pleats.

WHAT TO WEAR...

Abide by the following rules when you hit the high street and we'll make a leggy, supermodel of you yet.

Avoid three-quarter length trousers because they make legs look shorter. Trousers should be full length, falling to the bottom of the heel
Don't wear trousers with turn-ups or wide legs, instead opt for narrow, straight legs or bootcut trousers
Skirts and trousers with high waistbands make legs look longer too.
Create the illusion of height by wearing a top and bottom of the same colour, drawing the eye up and down.
Longer length jackets worn undone also give the illusion of height.
Avoid chunky, ribbed tops that widen rather than lengthen the body.
Wear heels.

If you have shoulders that would put an Olympic swimmer to shame, then try to balance out your body shape to give the illusion of a smaller frame.

Opt for bootleg trousers and fishtail skirts that widen at the bottom of the garment. It will balance out the shoulders.
Wrap-around tops are very flattering if you've got wide shoulders.
Avoid halter-necks which draw attention to shoulders.
Avoid delicate-looking tops, for example, ones with spaghetti straps.

Despite having average-sized boobs, there may be occasions when you want to give the illusion of a fuller bust.

Always wear a bra.
Wear high-necked tops or roll-necks to accentuate your boobs.
Opt for delicate tops with spaghetti straps.
Sleeveless, round-necked tops that show off your arms are great.
Wear tops in a lighter colour than your lower half.

As the proud owner of a fabulously, tiny waist, you must, of course, do everything you can to show it off!

Avoid covering your great asset with long, loose clothing.
Cropped tops draw attention to the waist.
Wear tops that end around the waist.
Don't cover the waist up by wearing high-waisted trousers.

If your tummy isn't a problem area, but isn't necessarily something you would want to draw attention to, use these rules when you go shopping:

Flat-fronted trousers and skirts are really flattering for a larger tummy. Try to avoid pleats and front zips - side and back zips are a much more flattering option.
Low-waisted trousers make stomachs look smaller.
Don't wear anything that's gathered at the waist.
Wear soft, forgiving fabrics that don't cling to the tummy.
Wrap-around tops create folds across the tummy that detract from any other rippling in that area.
Avoid belted jackets and coats. The belt will ride up and give the impression that you're pregnant.

While child-bearing hips are great for that earth-mother look, there will be times when you want to conceal your more voluptuous areas.

Don't wear dresses and skirts that cling or are bias-cut.
Avoid narrow-legged trousers and tapered, knee-length skirts.
Avoid belts that pull you in at the waist - you don't want to create an even greater contrast from waist to hip.
Opt for A-line skirts and bootleg trousers that balance out the hips and thighs.
Skirts or dresses with a frilled hem are a flattering choice.
Trousers with detail, such as side pockets, will make you look wider.
Wear slash-necked tops to broaden shoulders and balance out the hips and thighs.
Choose longer line, fitted jackets. Never wear box jackets which emphasise a pear shape.
Avoid cropped tops.
V-necked tops are great for drawing the eye away from the hip area.
Wearing the same colour on the top and bottom is very slimming.

If the answer to the question: "Does my bum look big in this?" is a resounding "yes!", then consider the following tips before hitting the high street.

Avoid wearing light colours on your lower half.
Avoid narrow-legged trousers.
Wear longer jackets that fall below the bottom and never wear jackets that end where your bum starts.
Wear jumpers around the waist over trousers to break up the expanse of bottom.
Opt for wide-bottomed trousers with no detail, such as pockets with pinstripes, on the bottom and avoid pleats.

maidless...

aku rase ok je nak hidup tanpa maid..sbb aku rase, lagi freedom duduk kat rumah..aku tak perlu nak tensen2 kalu maid buat kerja rumah tak mengikut spesifikasi..aku rasa lagi privacy..cume aku rasa maid di mesia ni sukar dipisahkan..sume org nampaknya memerlukan maid..maid ni kkdg memudahkan..ada pro ade consla sebenarnya..tapi entahla, aku rasa rileksla dulu..aku rase, kalu aku ada maid mesti skrg aku dah membesar mcm ikan buntal dan buatkan semakin pemalas dan tak berdisplin..

kkdg aku tertanya2, kenapa aku rasa life aku much easier and controllable sms my boy masih kecil tanpa maid..aku tak kisah nak tolak stroller amik my boy balik dari skool berjalan kaki..semuanya, dgn steadynya aku tempuh tanpa byk rungut..tapi, bila sekali dah ada maid dan kemudian tak de mood, semuanya terasa macam payah nak start semula..dulu2 lepas makan, aku dgn displinnya mesti siap2 lap meja, sapu lantai dan cuci pinggan..dan my darling plak mesti tak lepas nak tolong2 aku dan mesti akan buangkan sisa makanan makanannya sendiri ke tong sampah..my darling tak berkira nak tolong sidai kain mahupon vacuum lantai biarpon hanya sekali-sekala..masing2 tak berkira tukar2 turn nak cuci bilik air...

dan skrg, aku dgn sng hati tak kisah nak mop lantai dapur seminggu 2-3 kali..tak pula aku nak rase susah..cume bila dah ade maid, kerja yg aku buat rutin pon dah dikatanya byk keje dan menyusahkan dorang..hai ntahla...macam2 je alkisah maid ni..

Aku rindu...

Lagi beberapa jam my boy akan pulang dr skool..strange enough, bile my boy tak selalu berada di sisi, aku terasa sprt kehilangan..sblm ini, sms hanya my boy menemani aku buat kerja2 sekolah dan rumah di rumah tanpa my girl di sisi, aku sprt merindui my girl..soalannya di sini, kuatkah aku menghadapi perpisahan sementara mahupon kehilangan mereka selama2nya? bukan hanya bila berjauhan dgn anak2, termasuk juga bila berjauhan dgn my darling..aku tetap terasa sunyi..sepi..dan rindu..walaupon, my darling tiada di sisi aku sewaktu dia keluar bekerja..yelah, siapa tak sayang suami sendiri yang oiii???

Biarpon kkdg bila org yg terdekat dgn diri aku ade di rumah..mereka suka buat aku sakit kepala dan sakit tengkuk..tapi yg nyata, bila mereka tiada..aku jadi seorang perindu..rindu yg amat2..

Yang aku perasan sejak my boy pi skool dan balik pukul 3.20 ptg..aku jadi semakin syg..semakin berlembut hati..kurang sedikit aku nak marah2, tapi aku lebih suka nak belai2..kkdg aku jadi sedih..bila hanya beberapa jam saja aku dapat menghabiskan masa bersama my boy...sbb seingat aku, hari pertama dia pulang dari skool pukul 3.20 ptg..oleh kerana keletihan, my boy tidur awal pukul 7 ptg..aku terasa sprt hampa sbb tak sampai beberapa jam aku bermain2 dgnnya dia dah terlelap tidur..my boy sprt biasa..sprt kanak2 lain yg masih naif..tidak mungkin tahu apa perasaan seorang ibu yg terbuku di hati..yg ibunya ini begitu merinduinya di kala dia tiada di sisi...

Bila my boy ke sekolah, aku mengambil peluang, menghabiskan masa bersama my girl..baru aku ada masa sepenuhnya nak concentrate nak bermain mini-puzzle, shape sorter, stacking dan bacakan buku utk my girl sprt yg mana aku dulu spend masa bersama my boy bila dia sebaya umur dgn my girl skrg..seingat aku, aku byk stimulate my boy lebih awal dr adiknya..bila bilangan anak bertambah, tanggungjawab bertambah..dan pandai2la kita nak membahagi masa dan kasih syg utk meraka yg terdekat dgn kita..

My boy skrg aku lihat semakin matured, ceria..byk yg dia belajar melalui cbeebies..suka nak spend masa dgn komputer..dan perubahan lain sejak my darling byk spend masa dgn my boy..mereka sudah mulai ada connection..he start asking his daddy to accompany him when he wants to sleep..which a good start..for the whole family to settle down as my plan..cume kkdg, kami tak stick to the rule by 9 everybody needs to sleep..mungkin kene buat bit by bit..Kebiasaannya, samaada aku atau my darling akan bacakan sebuah buku sblm anak2 tidur..skrg my girl alhamdulillah nampaknya macam terikut2 abgnya, beriya nak menenguk buku macam nak tembus buku pon ada...

Perkembangan my girl macam biasa semenjak dia duduk bersama aku selalu di rumah..semakin manja..yg aku perasan, dia bule berdikari..periang, lebih lasak berbanding abgnya...mainan kegemarannya skrg adalah winnie the pooh&mini puzzle..

Kalu ikutkan..

Kalu diikut dah nak masuk minggu ke-2 kita berpuasa..aim nak overhaulled perut dan menyusutkan badan nampaknya hanya skdr aim..aim tercapai slps 3 hari berpuasa..tetapi lepas tu, bila aku naik kat penimbang..bebaru ni aku dah put on weight 2kgs...kuhhh smgt...cepat sgt aku naik badan..hairan juga..kalu ikutkan after 3 days fasting, I was 51-52kgs saje..

adakah sbb...

-vitamin yg aku makan?
-byk minum teh tarik?
-byk minum ais?
-kurang/ susah membuang?
-terlalu byk makan?

aku dah listkan sume faktor2 tu..tapi, yg aku perasan kkdg aku terlupa nak makan jamu NR aku..jadinya, aku susah sket aku nak memerut..semenjak berpuasa ni pon aku makan byk..kalah my darling makan kekadang tu..dan dah beberapa menjak kami makan sedap2..sedap2 mengikut mulut kami sendirila..

Selasa
-teh tarik/ air bandung
-puding caramel
-tom yam seafood
-nasi putih


Isnin
-teh tarik
-krispy creme doughnut
-puding caramel
-satu bar kit-kat
-crisp
-buah oren/epal

Ahad
-krispy doughnut
-teh tarik ais
-2 ekor talapia masak masam manis
-crips
-seketul plain chocolate

Sabtu
-teh tarik ais
-2 ekor ikan bawal masam manis
-nasi minyak

Jumaat
-teh tarik ais
-ayam satay
-nasi putih

Khamis
-teh tarik
-ayam satay
-nasi putih
-puding caramel
-triffle

Rabu
-teh tarik
-ayam satay
-nasi putih
-puding caramel

kalu ikutkan bukan aku seorang saje nampak berisi, my darling pon aku ngk sama2 naik montel..so, for surela sbb pemakanan ni gamaknya..

Puasa..

Dah 3 hari kita berpuasa..

Menu kelmarin
Coke
Nasi Paprik daging

Menu smlm
Teh tarik ais/suam(susu evaporated)
Nasi Paprik Daging
Udang goreng tepung
Puding karamel
Buah Limau

Menu hari ini

Sahur
Udang goreng tepung

Buka
Teh tarik ais
Nasi putih
Ayam goreng kontolo(3)
Udang goreng tepung
karipap pusing(4 ketul)

Plan utk esok
Inti karipap/ kuih seri muka
Ayam satay(bakar kat luar)
Teh limau ais

Snail...

My boy is a big fan of snail. He told me snail is one of his best friends ever. When I showed his 1 year old plastisin, he made a family of snail. He explained to me one to another snails that he made as each member in our family-daddy, mommy, himself and his baby sitter...I was impressed to see my boy first creativity using plastisin to demonstrate his imagination and creative thinking. We made the figures together. I helped him a little to roll and soften the plastisin.

Here are the pictures-my boy first creativity's figures-a family of snail..look how gorgeous and cute the figures are. They are made on 6th August, 2007 by my boy...He learned new words related with snail like shell, slug and antena while making his figures.



Am not pretty sure what is it my boy made for-the one sitting on the carpet. Probably nanny snail..hahahaha..

His very chatty now and know how to communicate and gather sentence quite well. Sometimes, his sentence is a mixture of English and Malay. Eventhough, my boy speaks quite later than my other friend's children, but am still happy to see his progress at this stage. His has proven his ability to talk and increase his level of maturity able to speak and response like an adult, although some of his recent words sometimes annoying me like:-

'what are you talking about?'
'i dont know what you are talking'

deep in my heart, it sound harsh on me as a mother. Sometimes, I can see, my boy trying to behave like an adult and manipulating the rules to trick the elder.

I must admit, nowadays, children is not like children in my year. They are smarter and should be told like a matured people. Whatever reason you want to give to them, it should be logic because they can think and they can dispute what we are saying if the reason is not convincing enough.

He loves to draw and to colour. Other than snail, he amaze with insects like ant and spider. He likes worm too. His very excited to see worm wriggling. He can explain transformation from caterpillar to butterfly. He keeps talking about caterpillar tight in cocoon before she changes to butterfly that I have never spoken or even taught about this before. All he learned are from CBEEBIES. He knows almost every single character in CBEEBIES..Sad enough, me as a mother does not know very well who they are except Sam the Fire Engine, Teletubbies, Big Cook, Little Cook..too many to write..His most favoured toy will be his 'Power Rangers' figures, transformer's gun and LEGO. He never been bored with LEGO since he is 1.5 years old. Its really paid off, eventhough LEGO can drive me mad if my boy doesnt store them well. Now, my girl start to follow his brother footstep. Try to stick 1 brick to another brick to make a figure. She is starting to copy his brother to draw and to colour. She really can't see pen/pencil, she will draw everything on it...

Semakin hari..

Semakin hari, semakin cepat masa berlalu..dan diam tak diam..my boy dah pon nak menginjak ke usia 4.5 tahun. This coming Sept dia akan solely attend the class till 3.30 p.m...Aku tgk perangainya lebih matured, kurang bangun malam dan dah dua pagi dia yg mengingatkan aku utk sarapan. Sblm ni apetite my boy teramatla kurang..Pancingla macam2, belum tentu lagi dia nak makan...ntah kenapa, hangin mana datang..skrg dia dah nak mula makan...Kalu aku lambat je bersiap di pagi hari, dia akan naik ke tingkat atas dan carik aku tuk remind...yg dia lapar dan makan makanan yg dia nak makan..perkataan synonym dia buat masa ini..

'mummy, am really hungary'
'what do u want to eat my dear'
'i want my cereal'

Pagi ni, slps mandi, dia nak minta makan biskut coklat di ruang tamu...kemudian, aku cakap tak bule..dgn bijaknya dia cube memanipulasikan, yg kat rumah baby sitter, kakak tu kata kalu nak makan biskut bule makan kat depan...

'mummy, i want my chocolate biscuit'
'we dont have any more my dear, but we do have Marie if you want, but u cant eat here'(sambil aku tunjuk sofa depan tv)
'i want to have my biscuit and watching CBEEBIES'
'ok, if u want ur CBEEBIES, we can eat in the kitchen'
'but kakak says, we can eat at the front my biscuit'
'oh, that was kakak said, but this is what mummy said, u cant have ur biscuit in the living room..this is mummy's house, so, u have to listen to mummy...at kakak's house, u follow what kakak's says, ok'

kemudian, my boy tersipu2..mungkin malu sbb taktik nak makan kat depan dia tak menjadi..In fact, skrg mandi pagi pon aku ta perlu nak struggle dan stress mcm sblmnya..tapi, tula...ini baru development utk kedua hari..we never know what will happen next...

as for my girl, macam biasa tak tahu apa2 sgt..tapi, skrg ni tersgtla kerap bangun malam..sampai sakit badan aku dibuatnya...dek menyusukan dia..

Very the bonsai..

Very the bonsaila aku ni..nama aku dah masuk dalam list of speaker pukul 10 pagi utk conference di US tapi aku masih tak buat bende walau semedang. Baik aku wake up, buat keje lebih sket kalu mmg betul2 berniat nak pi jalan2 US. Tapi dgn cara nila memangkinkan aku buat keje..kalu tak slow ajela aku nak siapkan projek aku macam kura2...Pukul 2.22 pagi..aku kejutkan my darling pasal berita ni..terkejut2 my darling aku kejutkan..

Aku ingat kalu jadi pi US kali ini, aku nak singgah ke New York or Washington kalu berkemampuan. Tgk keadaan..tgk boss aku macamanala..kalu dia nak sponsor aku dah lebih dr bersyukur..kalu dorang tak dapat sponsor tpt tinggal..sponsor tiket dan fee aku dah memadai..

Apa2pon aku dah kembang kuncup sbb dapat golden opportunity pi melawat negara org di samping dapat establish myself internationally..kalu ikutkan, aku kepingin dan amat2 kepingin nak sampai ke Australia dan New Zealand..agak2 ada harapan tak di masa depan..rasenya kalu takat nak pi Australia tu mungkin ada harapan kot...sblm ni mmg boss aku suh pi Australia..tapi dah tak sempat..maka terlepasla peluang...mmg rugi betul! Takpe..pasni kita usaha lebih gigih lagi utk dapat berjalan ke luar..

Age spots

Subject: age spots

I have clusters of black spots on my face -- age spots, I presume. Can I get rid of them? If yes, then is there a natural way of getting rid of them? Thank you, Philippa


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Response from: Sangeetha Ghana,
Council Member on Ammas.com

Philippa,
First, you need to decipher what's an age spot and what's not. There are several types of these unsightly blotches, but one cause is common to all of them, doctors say, and that's sun damage. You may have exposed unprotected skin to ultraviolet rays, whether from a tanning booth, a sunlamp or years of going without sunscreen. In response, your skin has tried to protect itself by producing an overabundance of melanin--the pigmented cells in your skin--in uneven patches.

Chemicals called psoralens are present in foods such as parsley, limes and parsnips. When you handle these foods and then go out in the sun, your skin may be more sensitive and burn more easily where the psoralens touched it. When the little blisters from the burns have healed, age spots may appear in their places.

Antibiotics such as tetracycline (Achromycin), some diuretics (water pills) and antipsychotic medicines such as chlorpromazine (Thorazine) will also cause your skin to produce age spots when it is not protected from the sun.

And if your favorite fragrance or lotion contains musk or bergamot oil, which are common perfume ingredients, it may give you more than a lovely scent. When perfumes or lotions containing these ingredients are applied to sun-exposed areas, they can produce age spots.

The most important thing you can do to stop new age spots from forming is to wear sunscreen--all the time. And an ounce is just about what it takes, dermatologists say.

http://www.mothernature.com/Library…

Home remedies for age spot :-

1)Drink 8 glasses of pure water daily.

2)Vitamin E oil or cod liver oil will reduce coloration when applied to affected areas daily.The best remedy is the cod liver oil.The only thing better is to use it more than once a day.

3)Wash your face with sour milk. Lactic acid will provide gentle peeling effect without irritating or drying your skin.

4)Blemishes and age spots can become fainter by applying lemon juice a few times a day.Dab on some lemon juice onto a cottonball then wipe the dark spots with the juice, twice daily. Do not use if your have dry, or sensitive skin. It may take several weeks of use before the spots will fade.

5)Another great remedy is to rub a piece of red onion onto the spots..it may take a few weeks of use before you see results. 6)Apply a paste of turmeric powder with sugarcane juice to remove wrinkles and to prevent skin ageing.

7)Apply daily, to these darkened areas of the skin, a solution containing 2 teaspoons of apple cider vinegar and 1 teaspoon of onion juice. According to this home remedy, the spots should begin to fade within 2 weeks.

8)increase your Vitamin C intake! It makes your skin less sensitive to the sun. Foods rich in vitamin C include citrus fruits, apples, green onions, black and red currant, rosehip tea.

9)Limit exposure to the sun and wear a sunscreen daily. Eat a high protein diet made up of 50% raw fruits and vegetables, whole grain cereals, seeds and nuts. Avoid all animal protein foods for 30 days. Avoid caffeine, fried foods, red meat, junk foods, sugar

10)To prevent wrinkles and soften your skin, you could try pure castor oil; it is known to slow down the aging process of the skin.

For free phone consultation visit http://www.skincare-plus.com/overtu…


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Response from: shine s,
Council Member on Ammas.com

Hi,
Yes there are many natural ways to get rid of age spots.

The fastest way is to go for a herbal facial with skin polishing once in 15 days until these marks are gone and then reduce the frequency to once every month.

If you want a home remedy,

1.Wash your face with a himalaya face wash(it's available in the USA).

2.Apply a face pack of mashed papaya mixed with milk cream or milk powder.Use this every day , 15 minutes and then wash it off.

If you have an oily skin, add a few drops of lemon to the above face pack.

3.Make a paste of mint leaves and cucumber and apply on your face and wash after 15 minutes.

Use either one of the face pack in a day,for a good effect use alternate packs everyday.

4.Diet, Nothing new...more fruits, plenty of water, lots of dairy products, honey.

5.Hygeine, Keep your hands always clean, and please keep them off your face.

Good Luck for a glowing skin.


(Rated by 6 Council Members)


Response from: hafza ,
Council Member on Ammas.com

Age Spots as a result of a decrease in the number and function of pigment cells in sun-exposed areas. Avoid exposure to sun for long duration. You should use a sunscreen whenever you move out in the sun.
Drink at least ten glasses of water in a day. Drink two glasses of water in the morning when you wake up, before brushing your teeth. Try applying lime (nimbu) to the discoloured area. Do this everyday, and wash off after 15 minutes. You could also apply lime to the affected area at night once in a while, and wash off in the morning when you bathe. Bleaching the affected area once a month will lighten it too. Do not bleach when pregnant. Various creams and lotions that claim to reduce pigmenation are also available. You could try them to see if they work for you. You can prepare this mask by first soaking 1 tablespoon urad dal and 4 almonds in water overnight and then grinding them into a paste. You can then apply this protein mask to your face and wash it off after half an hour. This exceptional protein mask will not only nourish the skin but also bleach it. For natural bleaching: - mix milk and lemon juice. The milk will break as soon as you mix the lemon juice in it. Use that mixture to massage on your body. It works as natural bleaching. Take lemon juice, mixed with gram flour, milk cream and honey for dry skin. Replace milk cream and honey with sandalwood powder and curd for oily to normal skin. Apply it on your face to ensure a clear complexion. Besides natural things and bleaching with hair bleach cream or hydroquninone you can only go to a dermatologist and ask for a high prescription cream for the hyperpigmentation.

Vitamin E applied daly on the pigmentation (in general age spots) will work like a charm, it will take about a week before you start seeing the effect or mix vitEoil with castro oil and appply that on pigmentation.

Sometimes bleaching the area may help too. Its best to use home made bleach, unless for facial hair.

The home bleach: combine two tablespoons of milk powder, mix in a enough liquid hydrogen peroxide to form a thick paste amke sure its not drippy. If your hair is very dark and coarse mix in a couple drops (like two) of liquid ammonia. This is considered to be the least harmful kind of bleach since the powder milk in the mixture moisturizes the skin while bleaching preventing skin burns and other reactions that comes from commercial bleaches.

Natural bleach Mix equal proportions of tomato juice, lemon juice and milk and apply on face and body. A skin tonic The juice of a fresh pear and apple with a few drops of fresh lemon juice acts as a good skin tonic. Mix one tablespoon of honey with two egg whites. Add enough wheat bran or wheat flour to make a paste. Leave for a few minutes then rinse off with warm water.


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Response from: Nisha Danny,
Council Member on Ammas.com

Hello, With aging, many people develop dark spots on their skin, particularly in the sun-exposed areas of the face and back of the hands. Others develop dark spots after pregnancy or trauma, such as an abrasion, insect bite or cut.
If you have dark spots on your skin, check with a dermatologist to make sure that they are harmless and can be left in place. If you hate the way they look, your doctor can remove most elevated dark spots by burning them with an electrocautery, freezing them with liquid nitrogen, destroying them with various acids or removing them by scraping them off. You can go to a dermatologist several times to have your skin peeled with weak acids, such as glycolic acid, which usually remove most of the pigment, but sometimes can make the skin darker.

If the dark spots are not elevated, your doctor can prescribe a special combination cream made by mixing one ounce each of 4% hydroquinone cream, any sunscreen and 0.05% tretinoin cream. You can buy the first two without a prescription. The third component, tretinoin cream, requires a prescription, but you can get along just with glycolic acid, hydroquinone and a sunscreen. The brown spots usually fade after you apply all three creams twice a day for several months.

How to reduce spots: 1.Prevent them from getting worse by using a sunscreen when you go out, paying particular attention to your face and hands. Make sure you choose a sunscreen that blocks UVA and UVB rays and has an SPF of at least 15. Age spots are caused by a lifetime of exposure to the sun, so you can stop them from getting worse by covering up. 2. Wear a long-sleeved shirt and wide-brimmed hat when you know you'll be in the sun. 3. Use an alpha-hydroxy cleanser and lotion on areas of the skin that have age spots. It helps to fade them. 4. Apply a fade cream like Esoterica or Ambi to the skin at night. They help to restore skin to a uniform color. The prescription medication Retin-A works like a fade cream on age spots. 5. Have a dermatologist or cosmetic surgeon remove them with a laser if nothing else works. Best wishes.


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Response from: sri sri,
Featured Member on Ammas.com

Hi Phillippa,
With Skin Lightening Creams, you will experience lightening / whitening effects on the face, skin, under the eyes, hands, legs, elbows, knees, ankles etc -

Works on all skin types, black, white, asian, indian, Also gives a great improvement on stretch marks, scars, age spots and other pigmentation problems ·· Skin Lightening Cream is effective for dry skin, rough skin, irritated skin, sensitive skin and oily skin. Levels fine lines and lightens dark spots from sun damage. Use daily with moisturizer for the best results.

ALSO WORKS ON IMPROVING SKIN SMOOTHNESS - (i.e DARKER SKIN AREAS CAUSED BY ACNE).

If you have any black spots on your face and skin due to harsh products, pregnancy and other causes, Skin Lightening Cream will effectively clear them in a few weeks. Rapidly and effectively lightens knees, elbows, ankles and hard to lighten areas for a more uniform skin complexion. Our lightening ingredients work with 100% Natural fruit acids and Aloe Butter to clear the skin and heal damaged cells giving you a wonderful even skin complexion

Contains no Hydroquinone, No steroids, no harsh chemicals. Please be wary of lightening products containing extracts such as hydroquinone, kojic acid, and arbutin. Some of these ingredients are known to cause long lasting and damaging effects, and some of which are banned for sale in the United Kingdom. We are pleased to be able to provide this new formula that contains only 100% Natural & Herbal Extracts.

Skin lightening agents can also be used to treat local hyperpigmentation or spots that are caused by local increase in melanin synthesis or uneven distribution. -

How long before the results are visible?

You will be able to notice changes in tone within a just a few short weeks of use. Total results will depend on the skin type and color. Some very dark individuals might not see any effects until several weeks have passed.

Are there any side-effects?

Not at all. All the ingredients are completely natural, and you should make sure that when you do use a lightening product that the ingredients are all natural, as is the case with our Skin Lightening Cream.

How long will the results last?

The lightening results may last forever. All you need is intermittent maintenance. Also avoid staying out longer in the sun than necessary. Suns rays will cause skin re-darkening. Ultraviolet rays has the effects of accelerating melanin production in the body.

Will this work for all skin colours (Black & Asian skin tones, in the same way as white)?

Skin Lightening Cream will lighten all nationalities, black, whites, Asians, etc. However the lightening results may be more rapid in certain skin types than others; and may also take a longer time to show in some darker skin tones.

Do I need to use sun screening agent with this product?

Yes, you need to apply a sunscreen before, otherwise the benefits gained will be lost. Be sure to apply a strong suncreen product to avoid losing the results of this Skin Lightening Cream.

Why has ALOE been added to the formulation?

Aloe is well known for it's benefits to skin care. Components of Aloe Vera have been found to reverse degenerative skin changes by stimulating collagen and elastin synthesis, in essence turning back the clock on the effects aging has on skin. One of the main reasons Aloe Vera has become so popular is that it possesses incredible moisturizing properties. Studies show that Aloe Vera improves the skin's ability to hydrate itself, aids in the removal of dead skin cells and has an effective penetrating ability that helps transport healthy substances through the skin. Aloe Vera is currently one of the most important ingredients in the cosmetics industry, being utilized in over 95% of the dermatologically valuable extracts manufactured worldwide.

TESTIMONIALS

This Skin Lightening Cream is different, and it doesn't seem to have any side-effects. Noticeable good results, without any of the stinging feelings as with other products.


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Response from: Anand V,
Council Member on Ammas.com

Hi Phillipa,
Age spots, also called liver spots, increase in number as we get older. By definition, they are flat patches of increased pigment, like freckles.

Though cosmetically worrisome, age spots are not threatening and do not need to be treated. On the other hand, it is no coincidence that age spots commonly appear on the backs of hands and necks, forearms and the face, all places that receive the most sun exposure. "Age spots are a reflection of significant sun damage.

Try these home remedies for Black Spots:

1)mix rice flour with curd and apply on the area. Rub gently on the skin. Let it dry and wash off with water. However, this mixture should not be applied around the eyes.

2)Wash your face with BROWN SUGAR, every twice a day 4 a week, if the marks are not from pimples then just used raw coca butter.

3)wash your face with hot water, dry it, and then soon after, on either side of the black spot, apply pressure with your fingers, and stuff should come out of your pores

)Make a paste of either half a piece of nutmeg/ six to eight jamun seeds with water/ rose water. Apply on your face. Leave to dry. Then, wash with cold water and pat dry.

5)Squeeze half a fresh lemon into one glass of freshly boiled milk. Leave for half and hour, then apply on your face before retiring to bed. 6)Take 125 ml (¾ cup) of tomato juice and squeeze in half a lemon. Add five to seven mashed mint leaves and black salt to taste.

Drink this every morning and evening for at least one week. It will help detoxify the body. It also helps to relieve constipation and worm infestation.

If you have a combination skin - Dry + Oily skin -try these home remedies:

Mix 3-4 tablespoons of Multani mitti (Fuller's Earth) with 8-10 ground pudina (mint) leaves. Freeze the pack overnight.

Keep outside for 10-15 minutes and then apply on your face. After 10-15 minutes, wash off and pat dry. It helps in cooling and cleansing your skin.

Boil a handful of lemon grass leaves in one litre of water, until you get the aroma. Then, place in an ice tray and freeze.

After returning home from work or an outing, rub a lemon grass ice cube all over your face. It cleanses the dirt and grime accumulated in your skin's pores and shuts them


(Rated by 6 Council Members)


Response from: simmer preet,
Council Member on Ask Agent

Dear Philipa,No matter what kind of age spots you have, they can all be treated.
Removal is the only way to make unwanted spots disappear totally. Doctors have many techniques at their disposal, including freezing with liquid nitrogen, laser removal, or surgical removal. Acid-based creams can also help.

Certain ingredients used over and over again in the hold herbal body care formulas for this problem. The ingredients include vitamin E, aloe vera gel, fruit acids such as lemon juice and organic apply cider vinegar, enzymes such as papaya and pineapple, witch hazel, and horseradish mixed with lemon juice, or milk.

Annie Berthold-Bond, Care2.com Producer, Green Living Channels says age spots significantly diminish over a number of months using lemon juice as an astringent and an aloe vera gel and glycerin moisturizer (3/4 parts aloe vera gel, 1/4 part natural vegetable glycerin).

Also long-term treatment with lemon oil will provide visible improvement when applied topically, as it works to gradually lighten age spots. This blend may also lightly bleach pigmentation and freckles.

*Have all spots/moles checked regularly by your doctor, and any changes in freckle colour or size should be monitored.


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Response from: ambreen AZHAR,
Council Member on Ammas.com

try lime juice,,,,almond oilis gud for skin try this,,,take anti-aging facial,

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Response from: pallavi sidella,
Council Member on Ammas.com

use scrub regularly for the face after some weeks u will notice the difference. U can even use this: put some lime juice or tomato jucie or combination or the orange peel powder to the face, wash with luke warm water after 15 minutes .

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Response from: Usha Gurnani,
Council Member on Ammas.com

You have to be sure what the black spots are before you start any home remedies.

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Response from: my advice,
Featured Member on Ammas.com

hi, you can surely get rid of them by using herbal/home made mask or face packs but it requires a constant practice. if you don't continue applyiing those mask or face pack which suits to your skin you are not likely to get rid of those spots. papaya is the best anti aging fruit. eat it if you like it and also apply it on your face. for applying this ,cut it in pices and mash it all ,apply it on your face , leave it, scrub a little by your hand and wash off. if you can get shahanaz hussain herbal mask, it will work good for you. try to do regular monthly facial with good massage cream and face pack. make a habit to use scrub once or twice in a week.apricot scrub is good one, ckeck it if it suits to your skin otherwise you can aslo make scrub at home. you can use rice powder or suji/rawa powder as a base and mix it with milk/rose water/simple water as per your skin type and scrub it on your face/body and wash off. drink lot of water and fluids. consume green salad/vegetables as much as you like. have a positive attitude and try to keep engage in your favourite activities. i have seen many people who do this, looks fresh and spot less. may be it is called the feeling which comes from inside and shows on our face. i know sometimes it is very difficult to do this while lot of obstacles are surrounded us but this is called life with ups and downs. so do not worry much and wear a smile on your face and do apply those mask/face packs which suit to your skin. yes... i forgot to mention one thing as check if there is any harmonal disbalance as this also badly affect on us hence we get some kind of problems in the result of acne/spots/marks etc. keep your hemeoglobin good and go for regular medical check up. hope this helps

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Response from: Sundori ,
Council Member on Ammas.com

Dear Philippa,
To be honest, it is quite hard to get rid of age spots. But possible. First of all, prevent their appearance by using a good anti-aging cream (try LOreal, Living Nature, Estee Lauder, Dior) and make sure that it contains SPF of at least 15 during the day. Use heacier cream at night. Also, keep your diet healthy and rich in fruit, veggies, nuts, seeds, lentils and fish, drink lots of water and take regular excercise.

Try this face mask after cleansing and exfoliation twice a week: mash some green papaya and mix 1 tb of it with 1 tb mashed avocado and 1 tsp honey. Apply for 20 minutes and relax before washing off.

Furthermore, try Palmers Fade Cream few times a week just on the affected areas, it works for age spots and pigmentation.

Good luck!


(Rated by 7 Council Members)

How to Get Rid of Brown Spots Using Home Remedies

Freckles/Brown Spots:Here are some natural remedies that will clear some of your freckles!

1) Apply sour lemon cream on your face. Do not rinse this mask off completely; gently wipe off with a soft tissue and top it up with a moisturizer.

2) Lemon juice is a tried and tested remedy for treating freckles. Apply lemon juice with your fingers on the affected area; lemon juice bleaches the dark spots.

3)Regular use of fruit and vegetable masks such as those made with apricots, strawberries, cucumbers and red currant will help lighten freckles.

4)Wash your face with sour milk. Lactic acid promotes gentle peeling of skin minus the irritation or dryness.

5)Heat honey slightly and apply to face, tap face gently with your fingers. Wash honey off with warm water then rinse with cool water. Stir in a little quantity of wheat germ into the honey before applying.

5)Horseradish juice or horseradish vinegar, or oatmeal dabbed on the skin is also helpful in lightening freckles.

6)Apply parsley juice mixed with equal amounts of lemon juice, orange juice, and red currant juice under your favorite cream will help you keep your freckles invisible.

7)Apply odorless olive oil or vitamin E at night before going to bed.

8)Dissolve some sugar in the juice of one lemon. Apply mixture to each freckle with a brush.

9)Grind yellow mustard in milk and apply to the face during the night. Wash your face the next morning.

10)Onions also can be used for removing freckles and age spots. Slice a red onion in half and rub on the spots twice daily. Continue until the spots fade.

11)Applying buttermilk on freckles is thought to help in lightening them.

12)Mix an equal quantity of turmeric and sesame seeds. Grind in water and apply to the face.

13)Take a watermelon, make a hole in its rind and introduce some grains of rice in it. Take out the rice after 9 weeks. Be sure to put it in the fridge! Grind into a paste and apply on the face.

15)To lighten freckles, mash 1/4 cup of unripe currants and mix with 1 tbsp. of unpasteurized honey. Put on freckles and leave on for half an hour. Rinse off with warm water and dab on diluted fresh lemon juice.


Tips
Take off any makeup before trying any of these.
If you don't have any lemon juice, you can use real lemons.


Warnings
If you have sensitive skin, don't apply lemon on your face, its could sting!
Not all of these will work for each person

Akhir Bulan..

Diam tak diam dah sampai kita di penghujung bulan..tiba tgk keputusan diet aku ditahap mana..aha..pagi tadi aku timbang dah menten berat aku 52-53kgs..tak jauhla dr target ujung bulan...harapannya bulan puasa nanti dapatla susut jadik 49-51kgs...malas nak target tinggi2..tp yg hairannya kenapa pula, kawan2 lama jumpa aku dikatanya aku ni cengkung?? agaknya sbb dorang selalu jumpa aku bermake up..sekali jumpa aku tak make up maka nampakla aku ni cam tak sihatla kot gamaknya..

Dah lama aku tak update blog ni..smlm nak tulis..terbantut plak..tereager nak menyampaikan aku dah susut ke 52kgs..tapi dgn hampehnya lepas aku excited dgn pengurangan berat aku..aku telah makan tanpa kawalan..skrg ni dah naik semula kot ke 53kgs dalam masa 2 hari..

My boy skrg asik sibuk dgn starship rooper..sampai terlupa nak makan kadang2 tu..kalu nak makan mmg kene diumpan dgn cerita starship rooper barula dia nak makan..dah semakin matured dan bule diharap utk main sendiri..my girl plak dah pandai sebut 'minum' dan 'kaka'..aku tak pasti sape yg direfer dia sbg 'kaka'

Menten jgn tak menten..

Hari ini aku tak berapa lalu nak makan..bangkit pon terlewat disebabkan cuaca sejuk yg menyenyakkan lagi org nak tidur..my boy pon tak ke skool, gara2 bangkit lambat dan kendian lak dalam aku sibuk2, my girl plak poo-poo..so, lagi membantutkan aku nak hantar my boy ke skool as jam dah menunjukkan pukul 10 pagi..Pagi ni sms kami ke pos opis my boy bertanya..

my boy:'mommy, why dont we go to school today?'
mommy:'because u woke up late this morning'

Dalam hati aku berkata..pandai plak dia dah tanya kenapa dia tak ke sekolah..sedangkan almost everyday dia menangis bila kami mandikan supaya dia segar bile sampai sekolah..

My darling lagi kelam-kabut sbb skrg rumah aku cume hanya ade satu kunci..jadi, apa2 mesti dia kene tunggu aku dulu sblm pergi kerja kalu tidak nanti rumah tak terkunci pula..Balik dr post opis slps dgn selamatnya send my darling's hsmp application form, turun dr kereta, my girl dah tak terkawal nak berjalan ke sana ke mari..bisa berdebar jantung mommynya ini..mana taknya, kalu terus my girl lari kene ke tgh jalan, sng2 aje kenderaan nak hit my girl..So, aku masukkan my girl dulu ke dalam rumah sementara si abg kecoh2 nakkan lego dia..

Kkdg aku hairan dgn anak2 aku.., mainan yg aku ingat nak sedekahkan kat org.., mainan tu jugak yg dorang dok sibuk2 nak buat mainan..So, aku masukkan semula mainan stacker yg pada mulanya aku nak donate tu utk my girl dan my boy buat main..nampak perkembangan iq my girl..dia dah mula belajar stacking..my boy plak, aku tgk makin kreatif dia main lego..macam2 bentuk dia buat..dr seingat aku kecik2 dulu, dia buat binatang lion ke hapa katanya from lego hinggala skrg sekejap2 dia bina tembak, camera, dinosour dan macam2 lagi..cume, aku je kurang sensitif nak amik gamba segala bentuk lego yg boy dah bina..sepemerhatian aku, dalam byk2 mainan, lego nila yg my boy langsung tak bosan tak nak main..pada permulaannya, mmgla aku marah2 juga, especially bila terpijak lego yg bersepah2 my boy kerjakan 2.5 tahun yg lalu..tapi, skrg aku macam dah tak kisah sgt..kalu terpijak lego2 tu, sakit sedikit pon..aku kurang sket nak temper..bile aku temper, aku masih ingat lagi my darling gelak2kan aku sbb mengaduh kesakitan demi nak let my boy cerdik nak main lego..tapi, pada aku alhamdulillah, buat masa ini, kesakitan aku tu seolah2 terbayar..

Hari ini dalam kul 10.30 a.m, h/bag baru aku sampai..punyela seronok terlompat2 dan terjerit2 aku dibuatnya..sampai my boy bertanya..'what happened to u mommy?' ..dan2 tu jugak aku dah pindahkan segala macam brgn aku dr h/bag guess aku ke h/bag baru aku..hahahhaha..mmg kualiti tu takkan sama, h/bag guess aku dgn h/bag baru yg aku ade..pi post opis, aku melaram pakai h/bag baru aku...tak kirala kalu org post opis tu nak kutuk aku macam2..

Jumaat ni, mungkin kami confirm pi swimming..rasa tak sabar2 pon ade..sbb dah lama aku tak main air..malas nak exercise sgt..so, alternative utk org pemalas sprt aku adalah dgn pergi berenang..Harapnya aku bule tahan makan utk hari ini hingga ke jumaat..kalu tak sng sgt perut tu nak nampak buncit..tak fasal2 kene gelak mahu pon kutuk dgn kawan2..

My girl hari ni pon duduk di rumah..skrg ni pon my girl sdg tidur sejak berjaga dr pukul 8.30 a.m..aku seboleh mungkin nak belajar buat kerja dgn anak2..next week my baby sitter aku tak de..aku rase, buat masa ni alhamdulillah, bule handle budak2 tu..mungkin lama-kelamaan nanti aku akan jadi alah bisa tegal biasa..

Sejak, my darling balik mesia..aku lihat dia semakin fatherly..ade inisiatif dgn konsistennya nak mandikan my boy pagi2..dan during dinner time, my boy lagi prefer his daddy to feed him..berkat air tangan my darling..my boy aku tgk nampak sedikit berisi..tghari tadi pon, my boy ade keinginan nak makan..walaupon sedikit..roti celur telur..
Latest weight update-bangkit pagi berat aku still menten 53kgs..

Dah beberapa hari aku tak update blog ni..

Latest update diet aku..berat aku dah menten semula ke 53kgs..dalam beberapa hari lepas aku mmg kurang makan nasi..tapi, sejak my darling balik dr mesia..aku mmg asik nak mengunyah..coke2 yg ada dalam peti sejuk, rase macam geram je aku nak teguk sume..pendekkan cerita, aku kurang ambil pusing dgn goal aku nak susutkan berat..but, kalu bule aku nak susutla ke 52kgs at least by end of this mth..aku tak pasti sama ada aku bule susut lagi atau tidak by this week..walau camne pon, aku tetap dgn routine aku buat exercise sbb konon2nya nak try fitkan badan..

Perasaan aku bile hari2 exercise? aku rase aku lebih sihat dan segar drpd sebelumnya..dalam sehari aku cube buat at least 20 sit up..cume squatting dan lunges je aku tak larat nak buat lama2..bisa gigil kepala lutut den...

Update ttg anak2 aku..my boy sejak dah masuk 4 years plus aku tgk perangai dia makin matured..kalu duduk di rumah, dia tak byk nak kacau aku buat kerja..dia sibuk dgn aktiviti dia sendiri..dah kurang bermasalah kalu nak pergi sekolah melainkan suke menangis pagi2 mungkin protes sbb kene bangkit pagi..utk my girl plak, semakin hari semakin lasak dan semakin ligat..aku tak nafikan, my girl ni lagi aktif berbanding abgnya dulu..kkdg geram jugak aku..aktiviti terbaru my girl, suke memanjat kerusi..my girl ni aku tgk cepat sket berfikir...kkdg tu, siap bule angkat kerusi sbb nak mencapai brg atas meja..yg ni paling aku tak larat nak layan..pasal kat atas meja tu yg biasanya ade makanan, cawan berisi air..kalu aku tak jaga2 mmg habis lencun dapur aku my girl kerjakan..selain tu, my girl semakin sensitif..tak bule kami naik suara sket..dia akan tunduk, menangis dan merajuk..arghhh pening2 lalat je mommynya dibuatnya..alhamdulillah, my boy skrg dah slow sket..paling2 pon my boy suke shouting sbb tak sabar nakkan sesuatu secepat mungkin..

Susu dah nak habis...

Susu semi-skimmed aku dah nak habis plak..mmg harus kene pi tesco sekurang2nya esok atau hari ini..bergantung kepada mood..kalu ikutkan aku malas nak keluar2..just duduk rumah diam2 dgn anak2..spjg my darling takde, ingatkan nak bawa anak2 bermain swimming pool di sini..ntah, berapa kali aku tangguhkan sbb iklim sini yg tak menentu..smlm, aku tak buat apa2 exercise juga sbb aku keletihan sgt2..ini pon, ingatnya slps ni nak menyidai baju yg ada..petang ni, dah berura2 nak masak sambal udang..so, bolehla, by the time my darling sampai..dia b/fast nasi lemak siap2..mesti aku akan terkocoh2 sedikit esok sbb by right my darling akan sampai rumah dalam pukul 8 pagi..my darling pon dah siap pesan aku dan anak2 tido di tingkat bawah supaya kalu dia sampai rumah, aku terus bule bukakan pintu..

Hari ini as usual, my boy akan menangis2 sblm ke sekolah..macam2 alasan diberi..nak tido, nak tgk tv dan nak minum susu..skrg ni aku macam dah lega sedikit..kalu dia tak sempat makan, sekurang2nya dah nak minum susu..jadi, aku tak perlu nak stress sgt2 kalu dia tak nak makan..

Pagi ni aku timbang dgn baju berat aku menten 53.5kgs..

Kawan datang..

Hari ini kawan aku dr London mai datang bermalam di rumah sehari..seronok juga berbual2 adela dekat2 11.30 malam..dr tengahari dia sampai di rumah aku..ade saje aktiviti dan makanan dan minuman yg aku hidangkan..mmg rezeki makan mewah betul kawan aku di rumah aku kali ini..Mana taknya for lunch aku servekan dia chicken wing lada hitam, tuk dinner sea bass steam dan sempat juga aku buatkan dia strawberry&banana yogurt drink tuk dia..Takpela, lagipon dia byk menolong aku, seingat aku siap poskan keropok dan booklet diet/exercise from London utk aku..jadi, apa salahnya aku berbuat baik utk dia kali ini..t/hari tadi sblm balik aku sempat bawak dia ke town..terus-terang aku admire dgn my fren ni..tabah dalam menghadapi ujian hidup, berjauhan dgn suami dan anak utk cita2 dan masa depan demi menggembirakan hati si somi..yg seronoknya, my fren ni jenis mengikuti fesyen, so adela sikit2 yg aku belajar dr dia how to dress properly..aku tahu minah ni mmg suka bergaya and beauty concious orgnya..but, pada aku bende2 ni sume tak salah, kalu apa yg kita buat ini utk kesihatan dan kesejahteraan hidup kita di masa depan..

Anyway, smlm aku tak exercise..segan dgn kawan aku..segan nak exercise beriya depan tetamu..so, smlm aku kontrol cun ajela depan tetamu..terus-terang mmg aku sibuk sket bila ade org datang..but, at least aku ada kawan utk mengisi kebosanan..

Pagi tadi aku timbang, to my suprise..aku dah susut ke 53kgs..aku tataula sampai bile dia bule menten..tapi sasaran aku kalu bule nak 50kgs..bila dah capai 50kgs..aku still kene mentenkan exercise to see any different from exercise tuk fitkan bdn aku yg dah already kembang sana sini..part yg paling mencabar..sudah pastinya tang punggung, perut dan peha yg aku masih usahakan hingga skrg..

Petang tadi, aku masak soup jenis lain..aku rase mungkin pertama kali, ala2 kuah dhal aku menjadi..kalu tidak asik ntah ape2 rase kuah dhal aku..ini pon sume by coicident aje, ntah soup aku rase dia macam kuah dhal pula..but, for today..aku mmg kantoi diet sbb for lunch aku makan McD...

My summary:-

B/fast-sebiji oren
Lunch-burger fish o fillet+fries
Dinner-Dhal soup+1 kpg roti
Snack-2 ketul plain coklat

Si my boy, bila daddynya tak ada..pandai pula sebut2 'I miss my daddy'. Hati ibu mana yg tak tersentuh..di kala dia bermain2, teringatkan daddynya pula..my girl masih macam biasa..tahu happy saje..yg aku perasan hari ini my girl dah ade 2 vocub baru..'nah&pak(campak)'. My boy ntah ape mimpi hari ini dah pandai merapu cakap

my boy:'mommy i want to marry u'
me:'where did u learn that?'-sambil ketawa besar dan my boy mula tersipu2..kemudian aku explain kat dia..'i am ur mommy, so u cant marry me'
my boy:'i want to marry u with daddy'

Hai, mana pula my boy belajar sebut kawen2 ni..agaknya kat skool belajar kawen2..hari ini dia story kat aku yg kat skool ade cat walking outside..the cat is very cute..byk juga vocub my boy skrg sejak rajin masuk skool. Tadi, sms kami bershopping, my boy siap suggest to buy my girl dolly..siap ajar aku in english sentece yg org selalu guna bila main anak patung..'dolly on bed' katanya..Tergeletik plak aku dgr dia cerita macam tu..kalu ikutkan my boy ni tidakla sgt fasih bercakap..tapi, sekurang2nya aku sbg ibu fahamla dgn bahasa my boy yg mungkin org lain tak dapat nak tangkap dan faham...Sprt biasa kalu ke town mesti aku kene pow mc D ngan my boy..selain tu, aku just shopping baju&sandal my girl. Sementara tuk my boy, aku belikan dia selipar dan topi power rangers..umur2 my boy ni mmg taksub betul dgn power rangers..but, at least my boy ni considerate juga..bile dah dapat selipar dan topi..dia dah tak mo aku belikan dia sandal clark lagi..aku beriya nak belikan sandal clark ni pon fasal tgh sale kat sini..nak siap2 beli utk bawa balik ke mesia nanti..sandal my girl yg aku dah lama2 usha tu pon dah tinggal rega £12 je dia jual..so, mmg aku tak tunggu lama2, aku sambar ajela kali ini..lagipon, my girl mmg tak de sandal lagi..

Sblm penutup, aku nak catat pasal my girl hari ini..since, aku tak de idea nak belikan mainan apa yg sesuai utk my girl..aku just berikan dia periuk kecik, mangkuk plastik, sudu dan whisker utk anak2 bermain...lagipon, aku macam dah tawar hati sket nak beli mainan lagi pasal dah berlambak2 mainan budak kat rumah ni...yg pasti sblm aku balik mesia, kalu bule aku nak belikan mainan kitchen utk anak2 aku..

Fit macam ini...

Tak tahu nak kata sama ada model kat bawah ni underweight atau just nice..but, pada aku dia fit..dan aku nak fit macam ini..no perut boyak..yg penting have a slender tummy yg macam ini..perut kempis itu penting..kalu tak dapat keding sgt camni..dapat sipi2 pon jadikla..kalu ikutkan aku tak mo keding..tapi, aku nak fit..



Hai ntahla, ntah2 berangan lebih je aku ni..kalu idak masakan aku bedal makan cheese crisp dan 200ml air coke..air coke tu mmg buat perut org tembum jangan tak tau! Bila aku nak taubat nasuha pon aku tatau..tapi, takat petang ni aku dah makan..

B/fast-cereal
snack-3/4 red apple&1 bar plain chocolate
lunch-sekeping roti&soup sayur
snack-crisp&200ml coke,4 keping biskut cream crackers

Timbang lagi..

Malam tadi kami anak beranak tidur kat tingkat bawah..malas nak tido tingkat atas..nampaknya lagi my darling takde..lagi lewat plak kami tido..my boy pon macam biasa sama ada daddynya atau tak de tetap akan menangis pagi2 sblm ke sekolah..mmg kene byk2 bersabarla aku gamaknya..

Pagi tadi, slps aku kuar toilet..aku timbang berat aku confirm dah jadik 54kgs..petang tadi after kuar town pas aku mandi, aku timbang berat aku semula..pon tetap 54kgs..perut pon rasanya macam susut sket..alhamdulillah berkat jaga makan dan buat exercise sket2..dan aku perasan since smlm, kalu aku makan jamu nona roguy before eating, kesannya lebih baik dr after makan..

Menu aku hari ini:-

B/fast-cereal+semi-skimmed milk
Snack-pistachio
Lunch-Nasi beriyani+ayam tandoori
Snack-mc d fries&1/2 cup grande MF
Dinner-sekeping roti+soup sayur2an

Skrg dah pukul 9.17 malam..rasa macam berkeroncong semula perut aku ni..tapi kene ingat pesan Mai, buat aje tak layan..lagi dia berkeriuk2, resultnya esok lagi akan rasa jadik lebih kempis..ari ni aku masih lagi tak wat exercise..mungkin lewat sket baru aku buatla nanti since aku dinner agak lewat tadi dalam pukul 8 malam begitu..

Hari ini baru hari pertama my darling tak de..memang agak membosankan..sunyi pon iye..tapi, nampaknya aku jadik lebih emosi kalu anak2 buat nakal..my boy tadi aku ajak dia pi town..bule tahan meragam sampai nak membuang air 2 kali..memang buat aku jadik geram..kemudian malam harinya, nak main bende2 tak patut..

Anak2 skrg masih tak tido lagi..my girl baru saje sebut2 nama 'bapak'..tadi pagi sampai ke petang dan skrg, my boy merengek2 tanyakan his daddy..my boy..my boy..bile daddynya di depan mata, tak de plak dia nak hairan..ni daddynya balik mesia tahu plak dia nak tertanya2..for me, bukan maksudnya my boy nangis2 bila my darling mandikan dia sblm pi sekolah tu maksudnya my boy tak sukakan my darling..it just trick saje my boy saje nak buat hiruk pikuk pagi2 sblm ke sekolah...sbb hari ini plak dia kasik alasan tak nak mandi coz nakkan his daddy..macam2 saje alasan my boy..kalu ikutkan kat sini mmgla cuaca sejuk..tapi aku tak bule nak kasik chance sgt kat my boy..otherwise, kalu tak mandi dia akan lebih rasa mengantuk..

Kat town tadi, aku beli baju pjs size 10..alhamdulillah aku dah bule muat size 10..in fact formal trousers pon aku beli size 10..saje beli yg kecik sket..bagi aku motivasi utk terus menten tak membesar..

My weight loss update..Part I

Alhamdulillah, syukur ke hadrat ilahi..pagi ni aku timbang berat..aku dah susut ke 54-54.5kgs..kirenya dah mencapai sasaran aim I. Hopefully by 2 weeks aku dapat mencapai sasaran aim II..turun kepada 52kgs..Kalu ikutkan smlm aku dah habis mandum fasal aku dok exercise baru 3 ari..tapi badan aku tak tonned2..apa da aku ni..baru 3 hari exercise dah expect gorgeous result..Rase stress pon ade tambah2 bile ngk body beach org yg cantik2..dok kenang2 bila aku nak have flut tummy and thigh cam dorang..

tapi, yg aku perasan smlm aku bule buat 50xfront sit up..cume side sit up aku tak larat nak wat banyak2 takat ni leh wat 20 aje...bile aku baca dan baca..aku nye masalah ni more at certain area...so, mmg kene wat exercise firming...smlm aku try wat squatting..mmg bercinta abih..sakit mak ai..

hish, nak cantik kene seksa2 camnika??? kalu ikutkan rasa malas aku..lantak pila nak layan exercise2 ni sume sbb sume ni hanya memenatkan dan menyakitkan badan..tapi oleh kerana, aku dah teringin sgt nak kasik muat pants ralph lauren yg aku tgk cantik gile tu..aku cube jela buat yg terbaik nak kasik pants tu muat..dapat muat sekali seumur hidup lepas aku kuar mrsm pon jadikla..adeiii punyala teringinnya dia...

bab makan plak, skrg aku cume mengamalkan b/fast cereal setiap bagi dan hanya makan buah in between meals..aku seboleh mungkin nak elak crisp, coklat dan sbgnya..tapi smlm peti ais umah aku dah full ngan coke my darling punye plus jajan-crisp and coklat 2 papan..smlm sebenarnya aku cheating makan..sbb dah tergoda makan crisp anak aku, dark coklat, coke somi aku sket dan kacang pistachio..mmm nasib baik timbang pagi ni berat aku susut..kalu tak..arghhh sure aku lagi tensen...

hari ini, my darling akan bertolak ke mesia for urusan peribadi..i'm gonna miss u like crazy darling! sure bosan gile duduk umah sendiri2 walaupon dgn anak2 bila my big teddy takde..am sure, my darling enjoy himself kat mesia dgn food indulgence dan jumpa kawan2 dsb..Mungkin bila my darling takde aku leh concentrate and more focus ngan keje2 aku dan diet aku..aku mmg dah siap2 shopping smlm beli roti dan serba sedikit sayur2an dan buah2an..aku ingat spjg 1 week ni malam aku nak makan soup aje..aku ade jenguk macam2 resepi diet soup like tomato+carrot soup, brocolli+potato soup dan macam2 lagi..bile my darling takde..tak perlula aku nak masak berat2 sgt..lagi pon my children bukannya cerewet makan sgt2..paling2 dorang nak nasi putih, salmon, telur atau pon potatoes..Harap2 budak2 tu sume behave nicely masa daddy nggak ade..kalu idak bikin runsing mummy aje..pagi tadi as usual, my boy meragam sblm pi sekolah nangis2 nak rak..sabo ajela aku..sampai bile my boy nak berenti meragam tak menangis sblm pi sekolah aku pon tak tahu..hanya kesabaran saje kunci segalanya..kalu ikutkan rasa amarah aku..sng aje aku nak naik tangan atau nak carik rotan..beristigfar ajela jalan terbaik utk segalanya..harap2nya tuhan akan mengurniakan aku kesabaran yg tinggi dalam mengejar impian aku selama ini...

Doa aku, semoga my darling slmt pergi dan pulang..aku pon tak harap sgt my darling utk ingat kami anak beranak selalu..as life di mesia too hectic dan terlalu mengkhayalkan utk membuatkan sesiapa saje terlupa...Dr situ, mungkin kita sama2 dapat berfikir..adakah antara kita sebenar2nya saling memerlukan? atau adakah hidup itu indah tanpa pasangan kita di sisi?

Call kawan lama-diet..

Tadi aku kal Mai..kawan lama aku di univ..yg mmg aku dah kenali lama sejak dr univ seorang yg menjaga badan..makan pon dia dah mula catu u masa zaman sekolah..katenya dia wat gitu sbb masa zaman muda2nya dia berisi sampai 60kgs..actually not bad lagi dgn berat 60kgs as tinggi dia 160 cm..

So, teringat si Mai..aku pon kal dia utk mendapatkan motivasi dan sedikit tips..mula2 kal minta pendapat..dia dah gelak katenya dia skrg pon dah gemuk dan beratnya dah naik mencanak2 gara2 makan vitamin utk mencantikkan kulit..bila aku tanya berapa kgs dia skrg..dia kate dia dah 52kgs..actually 52kgs tu masih ok lagi sbb dia tu tinggi..tapi sbb peningkatannya agak drastik from 47kgs to 52kgs for sure it is really alarming...

Aku gelak besar bila dia katakan pada aku..

'ko ni nak perut padat tapi nak kurus..camne tu?'

hahah betul pon..kalu ikutkan aku ni susah nak kontrol nafsu..tapi dia ade sharela camne nak kontrol nafsu..yg aku respek mmg dia kuat smgt..malam pon cume makan nestum atau pon oat atau ratah lauk aje..nangis u i dgr..tapi worth itla dgn tahan nafsu badan dia still menten sampai skrg..

kemudian kami berborak pasal, perut yg cepat buncit terutama bagi ibu2 yg telah beranak dua..sbb yela perut kita makin mengembang disebabkan oleh dah dua org baby membesar dalam tu..makanya kalu makan terlebih je mesti dia akan cepat memboyak...mai suggest kalu bule elakkan ais..sbb dia kate ais tu buatkan rahim kita kembang dan buncit..

mmm bilala aku nak mengikuti smgt si mai ni..anyway, perkembangan terbaru..berat aky dah menten ke 55kgs..kalu ikut diet rosemary conley tu..mmg dalam sebulan..simply je leh susut 6kgs..cume aku ni takdela kuat smgt mana nak berdiet sakan gitu..

skrg baru aku realize..takde org yg bule makan main bedal tapi berat menten tanpa exercise..sume pon kene makan berpada dan kene ikut cara sihat dgn bersenam ataupon jaga makan..makan apa2 bule tapi dgn kuantiti yg sedikit..aku rasa kalu ikut cara aku berpantang slps masa melahirkan alyssa dulu..mungkin sng aje berat aku nak turun..cume aku tak mudah nak mengorbankan nafsu makan aku..

Back in track..

Setelah beberapa minggu my time table chaos..i started to get back in track..preparing meals for my darling for his lunch and b/fast, wake up as early as i can..aku rase life is more organized when my boy start schooling again.

Cume yg aku lil bit dissapointed..my weight has increased to 56kgs..now am trying to sort it out again by doing some necessary dieting plus exercising..tapi biasala keinginan nak kurus tu mmg ade..but, implementation tu yg very very slow...mungkin i have to start serious dieting from now on and write the meals that i have taken for whole days as before to monitor my progress..

Aim I: 56 to 54
Aim II: 54 to 52
Aim III: 52 to 50
Aim IV: 50 to 48

Paling2 pon mungkin aku bule capai aim II. Kalu aku serious to sacrifice my high apetite towars food..most probably aku bule capai aim II dalam masa sebulan..cume, aku ni biasa hangat2 tahi kucing aje bile talking about my weight control..last week we went to Factory outlet..mmg ade a few trousers of Ralph Lauren yg aku berkenan dalam saiz 27-29..Siksa gile nak kasik muat bile menery yg membuatkan aku betul2 upset..tapi macam lawak pulak aku ni..sblm2 ni pon mana aku muat nak pakai saiz2 tu..yg aku gatal2 pi menery dgn badan tgh dipam2 ni sapa yg suruh? wakakakakak...adekalanya macam bermasalah nak beli designer trousers kat sini utk aku..since aku rendah..trousers yg sesuai sume yg berpinggang kecil 27-28..kalu tak mmg labuh habis labuh seluar yg aku beli tu nanti..sampai nak pakai pon kurang ade feel dan mood..

Anak2..

My boy
Smlm aku berbaring2an bersama my boy and my girl selepas penat keletihan makan udang, sotong dan ayam bakar di rumah bbq kawan di sini..Sambil berbaring2, aku berborak2 dgn my boy..i told him that i was very impressed he could look after well his baby sister in front of me for the first time..again i complimented him with several hug and kisses..and i could see how happy he was when i was giving him xtra attention...as time past by, my boy getting matured..smlm he refused bila aku usik2 to hug him tight sms dia nak tido..when he refused, baru aku dapat rasakan..how sorry i was bile last time aku marah2 dia asik nak berangkul2 dgn aku walaupon dah besar..kemudian aku teringat kata2 kawan aku..

'anak2 semakin membesar..semakin jauh..mase dorang kecikla kita patut amik peluang to hug and kiss them..coz as they grew older, kita nak kiss and hug dorang especially in front of their friends pon dia tak mahu'

aku skdr mengangguk2 dan tersenyum..fyi, my fren sudah punya dua org anak lelaki yg semakin membesar dan yg tua berusia 9-10 tahun..my boy nampaknya dah bule settle tidur sendiri dgn syarat aku perlu berada di sisinya..dan jarang berjaga malam dan tidak terlalu menangis meroyan kalu terbangkit malam..paling2 pon dia bangkit skdr nak minum air sbb haus katanya..tapi yg aku perasan sblm tidur mesti dia asked for susu..skrg nampaknya my boy dah pandai setiap kali ke toilet he will ask for daddy..sbb mungkin dah faham yg dia skrg dah berat dan mommy tak larat nak angkat2 my boy sgt..selain tu my boy dah bule diharap kalu diminta bantuan..tapi biasalakan budak2 ni mmg ikut mood diala..yg paling best, bila tiba2 my boy terajin nak angkut vacuum dan vacuum lantai..walau my boy vacuum ala2 budak kecil..sekurang2nya bila my boy dah angkut vaccum ke ruang tamu, mahu tak mahu aku pon terpaksa sekali alang2 sambung vacuum lantai ruang tamu..

smlm sempat juga kami bercerita ttg nose..kate my boy, nose has dark holes like tunnel..aku tergelak besar..bule tahan imaginasi my boy tentang lubang hidung manusia yg katenya sebesar tunnel..

my girl

dah semakin berisi sedikit skrg..agak beriya makan..yg aku geram kkdg, bukan stkt si abg dah jadi tukang sepah..termasuk my girl pon ikut sekali..sbb skrg my girl tanpa tak bersalahnya makan di ruang tamu..dan sambil makan dan jalan2..makanannya jatuh2..nampaknya kenala aku berkuat-kuasa undang2 dgn semua org..tak terkecuali juga dgn si kecil ni..

sudah bule diharap nak main di ruang tamu bersama abgnya atau sorang2..dah tak menjerit takut kehilangan mommynya lagi...sudah pandai menghulur kakinya kalu nak dipakaikan seluar..sudah pandai naik turun kerusi..yg paling kelakar, dia dah pandai panjat kerusi komputer aku dah berlagak sprt bermain komputer sambil tekan keyboard komputer..smlm di rumah kawan, bukan main suka my girl berjalan2 di taman nan luas..kalu bule semua tpt dia nak jelajah..pantang nampak tangga dia nak panjat..ade sekali tu ntah pelosok2 mana dia pergi..nasib baik tak masuk dalam kolam ikan..kkdg aku fikir2 alang2 nak anak kecik..biar terus aje produksi byk2 dan kendiannya tutup kilang..takdela terasa letih sgt nak bangun malam dan train bebudak ni...

skrg ni pantang pintu terbuka, pasti my girl nak keluar dr rumah..unfortunately, taman kami di belakang rumah bercerun sket...kalu tidak mesti aku tak kisah mereka bermain2..

Diet story..

Sejak dua menjak aku rajin memasak..dr minggu kelmarin aku memasak chicken chop, mee rebus dan kek coklat..sambung minggu ni makan sedap2 plak kat rumah kengkawan during bbq..kalu ikutkan smlm ntah berapa ucuk udang dan sotong aku telan..makan tak hengat punya..dan ni ari macam teringin plak nak masak udang goreng tepung yg my darling beli last week..sungguh menikam kalbu..natijahnya..berat aku dan my darling naik mendadak..masing2 perut ke depan..heheheh..aku saje dah bertambah berat ke 55-57kgs..arghhh drastik sungguh kenaikannya..kena jaga makanla kot gamaknya...di rumah plak byk sgt bekalan makanan yg manis2..macam coklat dan crisp..mungkin lepas ni aku kene serius berdiet..dan jaga pemakanan..hari ini nampaknya perut aku seakan susut..kewllll...mungkin ada harapan nak shed away lebihan berat ni..aku aim 51-52kgs pon jadila..

My boy&My girl

MY BOY

Sebelum tidur, my boy dgn routinnye mesti khatamkan sebuah buku sblm melelapkan mata..aku bacakan my boy buku ant..Ntah macamana my boy bertanya:

My boy:'why ants got many legs?'
Me:'because they are insects'

Kemudian mungkin dia terfikir fasal lembu pula..

My boy:'why cow got milk underside?'
Me:'because cow is an animal'

My boy masih tak berhenti berfikir..kemudian dia bercerita fasal pigs pee and poo in the farm. Katenya, pig has hole at the bottom to poo and the hole is round. Besar biji mata aku bila my boy berkata begitu..Yela, kat mana pula dia nampak pigs membuang?? Dalam tersenyum aku berkata dalam hati..kanak2 absorb knowledge on the spot and express it later. Sbb kalu ikutkan dah 2 bulan kami bawak my boy jalan2 di Pennywell Farm melihat binatang2 jinak. Agaknya di situ dia secara tak langsung dia tersekodeng pigs pee and poo. Tak pon mungkin dia nampak rancangan dalam TV.

Sblm tidur kami berborak2 lagi sprt org dewasa hingga dia nak terlelap..Dengan menongkat kepala menggunakan tangan, my boy bertanya lagi..

My boy:'why goat kids do not have grown horns?'
Me:'because it is not the time yet darling'
My boy:'why cant we put water inside the horns to make it grow?'

Aku cume tergelak sbb rase tercuit bile my boy berfikiran air yg menyebabkan tanduk kambing tu membesar. Mungkin di fikirannya dia berfikir yg air itu membuat sesuatu tu mengembang dan membesar..Mmg kkdg jawapan utk soalan my boy tu kurang memberangsangkan dr pihak aku..Aku akui aku hanya skdr menjawab and even sometimes aku pon tak tahu apa jawapan yg sesuai utk segala pertanyaan my boy. I read somewhere, yg its good for us to always communicate and stimulate the children to think to increase their vocubs and communication skill. Sbg complimentary terhadap perkembangan pemikiran my boy, normally aku just award him with cuddle and lots of kisses. Just to make him know that I am loving him to grow maturedly as good as he can. In fact, yesterday, ntah apa mimpi my boy..rajin2 pula tlg aku sidai dan kemas2kan baju. Walaupon tak seperfect mana..but it was a good start really. Bile melihat anak2 dah sprt bule diharap..perasaan seorang ibu tu seolah2nya nikmat itu tidak terkata dan begitu membahagiakan rasanya..

MY GIRL

My girl nampaknya dah pandai merajuk. Kalu dimarah dia akan stare semula kat kita dan pandang ke bawah. Kemudian dia akan buat aksi bising2 dan marah2. I think I should catch a video kalu dia merajuk lagi. Oleh kerana dia baru berusia 1 tahun 2 bulan..my girl tak pandai cakap tapi dia gunakan bahasa dia sendiri utk express emosinya..sometimes dia hanya menjerit atau sembur2 air liur tanda minta sesuatu atau pon protes. Tapi, aku perasan utk anak kedua, perkembangannya lebih cepat berbanding anak pertama.

P/S: Slps aku balik dr Europe..aku dah tak bother nak jaga makan..jadila berat aku skrg maintain semula 54-55kgs. Mungkin slps ni aku perlu lebih serius utk mencapai sasaran aku 52-53kgs dan seterusnya 50kgs.

Citer pasal keje..

Aku mmg agree kenapa perlu siapa2 nak jadik lecterur to study PhD..as from there u will learn the basic and application of certain equation..Hari ini aku study how to derive breakage matrix from statistical function yg mana sblm2 ni aku pon tak faham benda-alah tu sume termasuk apakah aplikasinya..dulu2 aku belajar skdr nak pass exam..jadi, bile hari ini aku go into details aku sendiri tergelak besar dgn kebluran aku nak memahami all those equations di masa lalu. In fact, skrg ni, aku bule describe with graf the meaning all of these. Senyum kambing aku sampai ke telinga..Kalu ikutkan not only statistic part yang aku cover but also including the numerical analysis subject yg x sume org bule nak paham. Mmmm, kalu foundation pon dah strong I dont see any problems to do any teaching..Apatah lagi kalu budak2 sume nak goreng aku..mahupon nak tunjuk terror kat lecterur..

Berperang dgn anak2..

Pagi ini, sekali lagi aku berperang dgn my boy..liat sungguh nak bangkit pagi..Aku mmg dah agak bende ni as malam tadi anak2 sume tidur lewat dalam pukul 11.30 malam..
Sedangkan aku dan my darling dah awal2 pancit masuk tidur. Agaknya my boy nak try tactic smlm buat2 mengantuk dan letih sgt supaya dapat excuse sekali lagi utk tidak ke skool pagi ni..Dalam aku dah siap mandi semua dan my girl pon dah siap bangun, si abg masih lagi nampaknya nak continue tidur. Bila aku jagakan dia..beberapa kali berikan excuse masih mengantuk dan nak tidur..Maka, aku dgn sabarnya walaupon kudrat aku kkdg macam dah tak larat, mendukung my boy ke bilik air..Mmg aku rasa takde jalan lain nak menjagakan my boy melainkan aku mandikan dia..dalam dia menangis2 syahdu, aku mandikan my boy..Terus mata elok berjaga dan elok juga ngk2 bile kat dapur aku bukakan tv ada pulak citer cartoon..Maka, lagi segar bugarla gamaknya..

Nasib hari ini..

Pagi ini nasib aku mmg agak kurang baik..pagi2 lagi aku dah terlanggar tong sampah..habis sopek bawah plat number kete aku..tensen pon ada..rasa nak marah si tukang angkut sampah pon iye..yelah, kenapa suke letak box sampah depan2 kete aku..biasa mmg clear aje..sbb tu aku tak cek ada tong sampah atau tidak depan kete aku tu..ditambah lagi ngan kepala aku yg weng2 fasal tidur lewat bila subuh menjelang..sakit kepala mmg tak hilang lagi..bertambah stress tgk my boy yg aku suh bangkit sikit punya liat sampai masa aku beruskan gigi dan cuci muka dia pon, dia masih pejam mata..Tang tu aku masih bersabar lagi..siap dukung lagi my boy keluar rumah masuk dalam kereta..my boy tu bukannya ringan macam baby baru lahir lagi dah..tapi dah nak masuk 15kgs..mmy kuhhh smgt..harapan aku, my boy akan terjaga bila aku kasik chance dia tidur lagi lepas cuci muka..rupa2nya sangkaan aku meleset..Sampai kat parking depan skool pon my boy masih pejam mata..Pon, aku masih bersabar..mengalah, angkat my boy masuk dalam stroller dan dukung my girl sambil tolak stroller..as aku pk kalu aku nak dukung my boy lagila aku tak larat..Pon, masih lagi sampai ke kelas my boy tutup mata..kendian, cikgu kat situ suh aku tunggu sampai my boy buka mata..pon sama takde perubahan..Akhirnya, cikgu kat situ nasihatkan aku bring back my boy home as probably my boy is tired..Masalahnya my boy tu pandai aje nak berlakon..Bile dgr cikgu dia cakap cenggitu, bule pulak tadi dia yg melepek punya kudrat sambil pejam mata tlg aku tlg stroller my girl..dalam hati geram juga aku, macam diperbodoh2kan oleh budak2..

Lagi yg buatkan hot, bila aku tanya my boy nak pee kat toilet skool, dia refuse..ngk2 bila sampai parking kete, dia plak kelam kabut nak pee..dahle baby wipes apa pon takde..dan elok pula ade spare botol dalam kete..nak tak nak, aku suh my boy to pee dalam botol..bila dah elok pee, air pee dia menjejeh2 pula..bikin stress betul aku ni ari..

Kalu ikutkan malam tadi my boy tido pukul 11 malam..tak pastila kenapa dia letih sgt sampai susah sgt nak buka mata..sampai di rumah baby sitter, elok plak my boy tu happy..macam2 saje budak2 ni nak carik excuse nak duduk rumah dan tak mahu ke sekolah..Tambah lagi bila my baby sitter offer nak tgh citer kegemaran dia..mata yg layu tadi di skool pon bule jadi segar bugar..

Menu smlm..

B/fast-2 kpg roti bakar
Lunch-sedikit nasik dan daging kicap, fries dan 1/2 fish o fillet
Dinner-mee goreng tak sedap..tak sedap pasal kali ni aku masak..aku pi gatal buh sos tomato..

Ni ari timbang..berat yg tu ari 53kgs..dan jadik 55kgs..wakakakkaka..mmg diet hancus!

Shall I give a 2nd chance?

Ntah, aku pon tak tahu sama ada aku patut memaafkan..aku kal kak W tadi tanyakan fasal citer lama apa yg x-maid aku dah citerkan fasal kami kat dia..since, jawapan that girl macam cool..patutla masa kami meluahkan pada kak W dan Cik Y dorang macam keluar telinga kanan dan keluar telinga kiri..agaknya fasal that girl explain macam org dewasa kot pada pandangan mereka..Ntahla,aku pon tak tahu salah siapa sebenarnya..buleke aku nak kata that girl sebenar2nya purely innocent atau macamana..

Not really pure innocentla as dia agak berfikiran singkat dan mula kemudiannya tu nak berfikir secara rasional..mungkin yang betul2 memburuk2an keadaan tu sebenar2nya adalah org luar..org luar yg memandai2 ajar that girl itu dan ini..kalu ikutkan aku pon naik confuse sbb that girl dan org luar tu pon nampak baik pada pandangan mata kasar aku..hai entahla, macam2 dugaannya..

Kepada si Ati aku katakan kpdnya, aku lebih selesa berdiam diri dgn Kak Y..biarla kak Y nak buat cerita apa sahaja tentang aku..aku pasrah..lupakah Kak Y akan dosa pahala hingga sanggup menyebar fitnah utk kepentingan dirinya sendiri? Dulu aku rase my x-maid seorang saje yg menfitnahkan aku...tapi nampaknya skrg dgn Kak Y sekali yg orgnya seorang yg berpelajaran tinggi pon tak menimbang secara rasional..Begitula manusia menjatuhkan org utk dia dilihat org sbg mulia..

Citer pasal menu aku semalam

B/fast-kellogs special K
Lunch-
Dinner-3 sudu nasi+sayur air kobis bunga&carrot+telur dadar

Aku timbang akhir2 ni berat aku dah maintain semula ke 53kgs..Kalu aku displin, Insya-allah bule susutla lagi 2-3kgs..Aminn

Peluang oh peluang...

Peluang itu datang semula..sewaktu my boss called me from office katanya..

Boss: 'milan this is much important meeting to go as this an invitation ..we have Dupont and Merck people to meet and discuss'

Dalam hati aku..gulp..kuat smgtkah aku berdepan dgn company gergasi..rase mengeletar pon ade..macam ye ye o je aku ni..sebenarnya aku tak kisah sgt dgn siapa and which co yg aku akan berjumpa or even will have sort of research collaboration..pada aku yg penting..i want to fly all over the world..starting from there, i start enjoying my career very much..kata aku pada my darling..anehnya hidup aku tak pernah ade mission atau tujuan..aku sentiasa dibawa arus dan sentiasa berdepan dgn peluang..hanya tepuk dada tanya selera..adakah aku mahu mengambil peluang tersebut atau melepaskannya dgn sambil lewa..I would consider samaada aku sedar atau tidak sedar..aku sebenar2nya manusia beruntung..cume aku saje skrg yg perlu belajar utk bersyukur dan menghargai pemberian tuhan..

Kalu ikutkan aku jauh lebih tertarik to attend meeting di Australia as aku tak pernah menjejakkan lagi ke negara bermascot kangaroo itu..but, my boss nampaknya more keen aku ke Utah..di situ aku akan berjumpa dgn org Merck yg mana aku sebenar2nya kalu bule tak mahu jumpa tapi terpaksa jumpa..mungkin dari situ aku perlu belajar menjadi manusia matang dalam meningkatkan kerjaya dan bukan lagi sprt keanak2an..kkdg aku tak percaya, impian aku seolah menjadi kenyataan..Maknanya ia bukannya suatu angan2 mat jenin..tapi, aku sentiasa positif dgn masa depan..Yelah, kawan2 di Mesia kbykannya dah naik pangkat dah bergaji hebat..tapi pada aku pokok pangkalnya how do we enjoy or passionate with our career....i love to make people understand the knowledge that am trying to convey including to see people succes in future..Pada aku segala2nya itu sudah terlalu dekat bagi aku..hanya aku yg perlu memilih..Working in education line with gomen offer me more quality time with my family besides berbakti membangunkan negara..sounds macam satu amanah besar jugakan!Rasenya mmg sesuai sgtla bidang yg aku ambil skrg as aku tak suke nak keje yg pressure and rushing sgt2..tapi masih punya masa terluang bersama keluarga dan berpeluang menjelajah dunia..kalu outstation pon bukannya selalu dan biasa mmg well planned dr awal..jadi mudah sgt kalu kita nak uruskan cuti say husband dan anak2 nak join sekali..

Bila berada di bumi UK..baru aku nampak peluang2 besar di sini..how to establish ourself as a profesional engineer, having our own name in board of company together with our husband, networking with others to be recognized worldwide..bila rase tepu..amik cuti sebatikal pula barang 1 atau 2 kali..stay oversea again..i dont know..probably negara suam-sejuk yg lain like australia or new zealand..kemudian work hard before 35 or 40s..doing a lot of publications and journals and later on get promoted..dan akhirnya settle down kembali di mesia di hari tua..makan duit pencen..as simple as that! Bunyi macam sempoi..tapi, mungkin ianya tak semudah sprt apa yg dituliskan di sini..semua org mengimpikan kebahagiaan di masa depan...dan kitala sebenarnya manusia yg perlu mencari kebahagiaan sendiri..

Bila dah berkecimpung dalam dunia baru, appearance pon perlu dijaga, cara bercakap pon kene optimis dan senyum2 selalu..barula org pandang postitif pada kita..pakaian pon kene cantik2 dan kemas, style mesti ada supaya lagi mudah didekati..tapi harapnya janganla bergaya aje lebih tapi otak tu kosong..tak sanggup u! Dalam diam, sebenarnya idola aku adalah Prof R..biarpon kawan2 sekuliah aku smcm anti dgn Prof R siap ada yg melabelkan Prof tu gile and killer...well, sorila kawan2..yang aku minatkan Prof tersebut bukannya kegilaan dia..but more towards her style yg mmg different from others..bukanla maksudnya aku nak jadi minah stylo..pada aku, her style tu menampakkan keconfidentnan dan keambitiousannya..Dari dulu, mmg aku suke merepek..even pernah sebut pada sarahmirza, aku nak pakai blazer dan skirt pendek macam org kerja hebat2 dan bekerjaya..Kalu ikutkan, sepupu Kak Wla yg banyak bagi idea how important career women to dress since katanya, sedangkan fulltime housewife macam dia pon perlu utk well dressed apatah lagi kalu kita org bekerja..Well dressed bukan maksudnya have to spend lots of money to buy clothes or accessories or make up..tapi cukup sekadar sedap mata org yg memandang...dan yg penting kata my darling..isteri adalah cermin diri seorang suami..owwww yakah begitu?

Dari sini, aku mula akui mungkin betul apa yg cikgu aku di mrsm dok kecoh2 dulu..kami pelajar2 di mrsm nanti yg menjadi org2 penting negara..rasenya masa cikgu dok bebel2 tu..macam masuk telinga kanan dan keluar telinga kiri..tapi bila dah menginjak usia baru nak faham dan menghargai..terima kasih cikgu2 di mrsm sana..agaknya dah tua cikgu2 aku tu semua..walau apa pon aku start enjoy dgn my new career...Pendek kata, mmg aku dah nampak dan view sume2 tu, cume skrg apa yg aku perlu buat adalah berusaha sekeras mungkin utk mencapai impian tu kesemuanya..Harapnya aku tak mudah nak patah semangat!

Bye..bye Holland&Belgium..

Sblm bertolak ke Holland dan Belgium berat aku dah pon menten 53kgs..Perut pon agak kempis walaupon tak sepenuhnya kempis..tapi still bila bergambar aku nampak besar..tensen sungguh! Makna kata kenala aku berusaha keras menyusutkan lagi berat ke 50-51kgs..pagi tadi slps mandi aku timbang berat aku semula..dah pon naik semula ke 1kg..biasala tu as kalu berjalan mmgla makan pon tak tentu dan tak terjaga..aku mmg byk sgt makan junk food like fries and biscuits yg mana smmgnya makanan tu strictly prohibited utk org yg sedang berdiet..Tak mengapalah, kita buat lagi mission baru menurunkan berat ke 52kgs pula dalam bulan ni..

My beautiful doter..

Hari ini aku nak menulis ttg my girl..Baru2 ini kami potong rambut dia as aku rimas tgk rambut dia macam profesor serabai..Stkt ini aku dah nampak byg sifat2 my girl..

-humour
-berani
-kreatif
-manja
-sekali-sekala sporting dan tak jeles dgn abgnya..

Aku nak gelak..

Kkdg aku kasihan juga dgn org2 yg taksub dgn makanan2 instant diet ni..termasuk diri aku sendiri yg mana normal utk seseorang mahukan perubahan secara drastik..Baru2 ni aku browse thru web pengamal2 herbalife..ade yg turun hanya 2kgs selama 3-4 bulan..pada aku itu satu penderitaan dan kerugian besar..kenapa aku derita dan rugi besar? fasal dia terpaksa menelan makanan yg sama yg tidak bervariasi selain dr kene spend duit puluhan hinggala ke ratusan ringgit..Kalu aku jadi that person, I will not stick with that Herbalife Diet anymore..unless, mmg kita suke dgn makanan tu dan mmg tak punya byk masa utk prepare makanan sendiri..than, herbalife is the best option..Nevertheless, some indicate significant convincing result..tapi of course bukan pada aku as aku jenis manusia cepat jemu..Jadinya, diet aku not solely bergantung kpd herbalife sblm ini..tapi lebih kepada makanan bervariasi..tapi ade juga makanan yg aku ambil agak rutin cthnya smoothie..but at least it taste nice and fresh!

Pagi tadi aku timbang still berat aku maintain 53kgs..Sekurang2nya much better dan before..Lagi 2 hari aku akan see the result sama ada mengenai sasaran atau tidak berat aku susut ke 52-53kgs...

Aku geram..

Aku geram dgn diri aku sendiri fasal tak displin sms berdiet..smlm aku tertewas sms di Tesco teruja membeli Kit Kat Fine Dark Chocolate..bukan stkt 1 bar je aku beli tapi 4 bar sbb elok je mase tu ade offer..mmg tak kuat smgt betul! Kendian for dinner aku makan nasi selambak2nya dgn lauk kari..ntahla aku ni kalu dah berjumpa nasi bukan lagi bagai bernafsu dan nak bertambah..mungkin jugala sbb siang hari aku dah guna byk tenaga mengambil dan menghantar anak2, memasak, mengemas rumah, melayan anak2-somi dan sbgnya..

Sebenarnya semenjak my boy stay kat rumah..aku adela beberapa kali macam diserang migrain sakit kepala especially bila my boy buat perangai mengada2..nak dimasukkan my boy ke nursery maya rasenya tak berbaloi coz kat situ lagila ramai budak2 bawah umur..takut bertambah pula mengada2 my boy nanti..yg meletihkan bile jaga bebudak ni bila dorang buat peel dan kita pula kene bertegang leher, nak marah dan emosi..sume2 tu pada aku meletihkan..aku letih nak marah2 org dan nak naik2 suara dan juga nak cakap benda yg sama berulang kali..sbb pada aku membebel itu smmgnya meletihkan dan kalu bule aku smmgnya tak mahu membebel..tapi kkdg org dalam rumah tu walaupon mereka faham..kemudian masih juga buat2 tak faham..grgrggrgr...lama kelamaan mahu aku jadi tua sebelum usia sbb selalu marah2..

Smlm my darling balik kerja pon terperasan aku nampak macam keletihan..Tanya my darling:

My darling: 'u letihkan yang?'

Me: 'mmg pon yang letih'


My darling: 'kalu begitu kita balik sajala mesia'

But what is the different pada fikiran aku kalu aku di Mesia? Still aku kene buat rutin yg sama sprt aku buat di sini..mmm kalu balik mesia lagila komitmen aku lagi besar...rumah pon ade 4 bilik semuanya nak dikemaskan...anak2 pastinya aku juga yg kene hantar dan amik dr rumah baby sitter/nursery..aku tak nampak apa2 byg nak ambil maid slps ini..stkt ini cukup2la dgn experience yg aku lalui sblm ini dan kalu bule aku malas nak bergantung harap dgn sesiapa..baik semua usahakan sendiri..hati tak sakit cume letih sedikit tak mengapa..Itu belum lagi memenuhi tuntutan keluarga di kg dan mentua..Sekali-sekala aku balik ke Mesia saje, my darling bz tak terkata..terlalu byk komitmen dgn keluarga yg menuntut pemahaman seorang isteri..